The Messy Middle — Where Growth Feels Weird
Here we are — Saturday night — and I’m writing my third blog post of the week. Yep, third. Not because I’m out here cranking out masterpiece after masterpiece... but because nothing I wrote this week felt right enough to hit publish.
This is what the journey looks like sometimes. Not the aesthetically pleasing pictures. Not the perfectly curated posts. But this. The messy, uncertain middle. The "I’m showing up but also lowkey hiding" energy. 😅
Flow... or Stuck?
I’ve been saying I’m just going with the flow lately — but if I’m being honest — it hasn’t always felt like flow. It has felt a little like being stuck. A little like standing still in a river that I know is pulling me somewhere good... but also holding on to the shore because the current feels scary.
I'm in this in-between phase of stepping into the life I know I’m meant for... while my old self is like, “Umm... are we sure about this?”
Chaos is comfortable when it’s what you’ve always known. Even if you hate it. Even if you’re ready to leave it behind. It still calls you back because it’s familiar. And letting go of that version of myself? Whew... it’s a process.
The Scary Part of Growth
I know the life I want is waiting for me. I feel it. Opportunities I can’t even imagine are lining themselves up. The highest version of me is waving me in like, “Sis, come on!”
But fear is sneaky.
Fear will make you question what you know in your bones. Fear will have you clinging to what you’ve outgrown just because it’s comfortable.
And that’s where I’m at. Smack dab in the messy middle — shedding an old version of myself while writing the new story.
A Wake-Up Call (Thanks, Self-Love Quiz)
This week my Self Love/Mindset Coach sent me a quiz to check in on my self-love journey.
I was feeling real good about myself. Marking those 4’s and 5’s left and right.
And then... two questions stopped me in my tracks:
Are you nourishing your body?
Are you moving your body?
Insert record scratch.
I skipped them. Uh, excuse me, surely these weren’t about self love. This is about mindset and affirmations... right?
Spoiler: It’s about both.
I sat with the questions for a few minutes and realized... DUH. Of course loving my body isn’t just about saying nice things to it — it’s about taking care of it. Feeding it well. Moving it like it deserves to move. Nourishing it like I actually love it.
And wow... that realization hit me like a brick.
Grace in the Mess
So here I am — owning it. I’m doing the inner work. The mindset work. The healing. The loving myself deeply. And somehow I totally skipped over the most obvious part — my physical body.
But that’s the journey. That’s what’s beautiful (and sometimes really annoying) about growth. We don’t know what we don’t know... until we do.
And when we know better — we do better. Or at least, we try.
This Messy Middle? It's Normal.
Nobody talks about this part enough. Everyone loves to show you the "before" and the "after." But the during? The messy middle? The sitting-with-yourself-in-the-awkward-in-between?
That’s where the real work happens.
So this is me — raw, unfiltered, and showing up in the mess. Three days ago I was out here sprinkling positive fairy dust everywhere I went. Today? I wanted to hide in my shell.
But I didn’t. I showed up.
I wrote.
I attended an event.
I put away some laundry (yes, that counts). 🤣
Because these small moments matter. These little steps are the journey.
If you’re in your messy middle — welcome.
You’re not alone.
Sit with the discomfort.
Feel it. Learn from it.
And then? Flow forward — even if it’s slow. Even if it’s scary. Even if it looks like standing still for a minute while you catch your breath.
Because growth? Growth looks really good on you. 💜
